Full Anyway

 

“The true light which enlightens everyone, was coming into the world.  He was in the world, and the world was made through him, yet the world did not know him. He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him. But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, not of the will of man, but of God.” John 1:9-13

And she gave birth to her firstborn son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths and laid him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.” Luke 2:7

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him.  In love, he predestined us for adoption through Jesus Christ according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.” Ephesians 1:3-7

 

Fullness, in the Greek it is the word; pleroma. It means to be filled up, completely full, whole, super abundance. It kind of reminds me of what my belly felt like after I ate just a few days ago as we celebrated Thanksgiving. There was literally no more room for anything else to fit in.

As I was reading through Ephesians this week, that word, and the thought of fullness just kept replaying in my mind. And with Christmas just around the corner and all the beautiful songs that retell the most precious story from that first Christmas night, I am hung up on this one thought. When God decided that it was time to make His entrance into this world, the world that He had planned and created, scripture tells us in Luke 2:7 that all the rooms where FULL, “…there was no room for them in the inn.”  My commentary adds that, “this may mean that the innkeeper did not want them there.” The beautiful wisdom of God wastes no time in proclaiming the truth of Himself against the dark backdrop of our own disinterest in Truth, Himself. The One who was coming to offer us all the fullness of God was greeted from the beginning with the fullness of our rejection.

Isn’t that just like God?  He comes anyway.

I love that about Him.

I love that for years as I continued to run away from Him, proclaiming, “there’s no room here for You, Jesus”, He just kept coming anyway.

There was coming a time for me, when I was as the Greek definition describes the word, I was “filled up completely with myself.” I had reached the fullness of my depravity, run as far as sin and foolish flesh could take me.  If you had asked me at that moment what I had to offer Jesus, I would shout as loud as I could, “NOTHING!”

That’s the point.

As long as I had room in me, I would not make room for Him.

But He knocked and I opened and at once I discovered the Truth of Who Jesus is…who He came to be for all of us.

At the moment when I couldn’t stand myself the most, He allowed me the chance to step right out of who I was and right into who He is, and I became at that moment a whole new person that I never knew was possible.

“The true light which enlightens everyone, was coming into the world.  He was in the world, and the world was made through him, yet the world did not know him. He came to his own, and his own people did not receive him. But to all who did receive him, who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God, who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, not of the will of man, but of God.” John 1:9-13

I became born of God!

It’s still too good to be true, except that it is true. I don’t fully understand it, but I know that I am living it. Before this happened to me, there was a fullness that I sought after in and from the world and even those in the world.  And I was miserable because I could never find it.  It was like I was on a treasure hunt, but I was never going to find the treasure. And after a while I knew it, but I didn’t know how to stop hunting, so I just tried to find lesser things to fill myself with. But they never worked.  I was always empty. And after a while, the emptiness began to define me, so that I no longer even believed I was worthy of a treasure, even if I did find it. And then that unworthiness defined me. And I became a very lost and sad woman.

That has been the hardest part of being born of God, just training my heart be BELIEVE again.  There is a believing that must be turned around. Where once I sought my treasure in the world, I now seek it in Christ and in knowing who I am through His Word. His promises are my treasure for they proclaim truth and that truth defines me and allows me to know my great worth to God, through Jesus Christ.

Whereas before I would not make room for Jesus because I was pursuing my treasure in the world, now I make no room for the world because I am pursuing my treasure in Jesus.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him.  In love, he predestined us for adoption through Jesus Christ according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.” Ephesians 1:3-7

I am on a journey that began long before I was ever born. It started in the heart of God, when He had an idea and called it, “Rhonda,” and it became me! And then He watched His idea become born into a world system that did everything to steal, kill and destroy God’s idea. And He knew that one day His story would intersect mine. And one day, He would have to give His life to pay for my story to be read, in the Light of His love, His original idea that began in His heart would become real in His Light.

He has written your story too. You are God’s idea.

You are so much more than you may realize.

There is a fullness that comes when we finally fit in where we were always mean to be.  If puzzle pieces could talk, I bet they would express exactly what I am talking about, once they finally leave the shifting and shaking of the box and settle in to the greater belonging of becoming part of a picture that is so much bigger than the one they alone could ever begin to display as a lone piece.  Like us, they never rest or find purpose until they take their place in their greater belonging.  And also, like us, the whole picture is waiting for them to find that resting place, settle in and bring their own display of splendor into it. The picture is incomplete without each piece and we are those pieces in God’s story, His family.

We can live our whole lives searching for our fullness, or we can finally rest in the fullness that has already come for us through Jesus Christ.

Don’t worry if you have no room for Him.

He has come anyway.

He is waiting for you to be born anyway.

 

 

 

 

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